Miata Mailing List: March 1998, Message #2493

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Thought the list might get a kick out of this.

Darwin

<< << Actual Bumper Stickers!!!
  * The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.
  * If you smoke after sex, your doing it too fast.
  * I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
  * If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.
  * Good girls get fat, bad girls get eaten.
  * We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated.
  * Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
  * Born free... taxed to death.
  * The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
  * Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
  * A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
  * A cat almost always blinks when hit in the head with a ball peen
 hammer.
  * There's too much blood in my alcohol system.
  * I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
  * Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
  * WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
  * You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
  * BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
  * I got a gun for my wife, best trade I ever made.
  * So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute!
  * Jesus may love you, but he won't respect you in the morning.
  * Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.
  * I need someone really bad... are you really bad?
  * If, a two letter word for futility
  * I don't care, I don't have to.
  * Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
  * Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
  * To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.
  * I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
  * Horn broken, watch for finger.
  * All men are idiots ... I married their king.
  * The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
  * My kid had sex with your honor student.
  * Earth first...we'll mine the other planets later.
  * Give pizza chants.
  * Don't hit me. My lawyer's in jail.
  * This isn't burger king, you can't have it your way.
  * How can I be overdrawn, I still have checks!
  * If something goes without saying, LET IT!
  * If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
  * Help wanted telepathy: you know where to apply
  * Work is for people who don't know how to fish.
  * IRS We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
  * Hard work has a future payoff, laziness pays off now.
  * Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks your an asshole.
  * Life's a buffet... so eat me!
  * I'm just driving this way to piss you off.
  * Jesus paid for our sins... now lets get our money's worth.
  * Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
  * Missing your cat? Try looking under my tires.
  * I love cats ... dead ones
  * I love cats ... they taste just like chicken
  * Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  * Keep honking, I'm reloading.
  * Prevent inbreeding: ban country music.
  * As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
  * Spotted owl taste just like chicken.
  * Hang up and drive.
  * Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.
  * Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
  * Snatch a kiss, or vice versa.
  * I don't have to be dead to donate my organ.
  * WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition
  * Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep
  * I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather ... Not screaming and
 yelling
 like the passengers in his car.
  * Tow-ers will be violated
  * Montana -- At least our cows are sane!
  * Jesus died for my sins and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.
  * Lord save me from your followers.
  * Meat is yummy!
  * Mean people rule!
  * Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.
  * Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit.
  * Born again pagan.
  * God must love stupid people, he made so many.
  * I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
  * So many recipes, so few cats.
  * Cats... the other white meat.
  * The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
  * I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a
 vegetarian.
  * Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!
  * There's too much youth, how about a fountain of smart.
  * Save a mouse... Eat pussy!
  * P.E.T.A.: People Eating Tasty Animals
  * Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
  * It IS as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
  * When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case heaven is like the
 IRS.
  * Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
  * Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
  * Wink, I'll do the rest!
  * Rainy days and automatic weapons always get me down.
  * I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
  * When there's a will, I want to be in it!
  * Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
  * I love animals...they're delicious.
  * If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
  * Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!
  * It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
  * Reality? That's where the pizza delivery guy comes from!
  * Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal !
  * Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
  * Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  * I know what you're thinking, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
  * Don't drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.
  * Elvis is dead, and I'm not feeling to good myself.
  * We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
  * A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.
  * Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
  * Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
  * Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
  * Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
  * Beam me up Scotty, there are no virgins left.
  * Beam me up Scotty, this planet sucks!
  * Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
  * Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
  * I souport publik edekasion
  * hoket on foniks werked fur me
  * Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
  * 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
  * Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
  * Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a
 rock.
  * 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
  * I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with subatomic
 particles.
  * I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die.
  * Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off >> >>